(tl;dr at bottom)(tl;dr means too long; didn't read. e.g. lol [link])



i do it too much, contemplate life. and i can't stick to a single perspective.
everything is confusing. blurgh.
one of my friend's advice about this was 'then don't think about it.'
i tried that. it worked for a while which was fabulous. but then i started thinking about it again.

but yeah, mostly when i think about these concepts it's in a pessimistic way, which is probably unhealthy mentally but it's pretty interesting to me...

in invisible monsters by chuck palahniuk (favorite book ever. i don't read much though, even though i'd like to say i do, haha), one of the quotes from the book is
'we are all such products.'
and i find this to be really quite true.. especially with learning about socialization in study of society.
who are we truly? what should we genuinely value in the world?
are we materialistic?
i switch through the channels,
mtv- some dude with these chicks fighting for his love (rock of love. god i hate this show)
discovery channel- global warming, glaciers melting... we're doomed basically
sbs- natural disasters everywhere
arena- making over some insecure woman to be fashionable and i.e. fabulous
animal planet- groomer has it: groomers fight to be the best dog groomer
discovery channel hd or something- investigating taboos. my mum told me to turn it off because she thought it was gross.
and the list goes on.

and in 'ize of the world' lyrics by the strokes, ([link]) they state:
'Am I a prisoner to instincts or do my thoughts just live as free and detached as boats to the dock?'
now i don't get the full meaning of that because i am not that smart, but i get the drift.
continuing on with the lyrics of the song also back up the chuck palahniuk quote-

"An egg to fertilize,
A pulse to stabilize,
A body to deodorize,
A life to scrutinize,
A child to criticize,
Young adultsto modernize,
Citizens to terrorize,
Generations to desensitize.
A desk to organize,
A product to advertise,
A market to monopolize,
Movie stars to idolize,
Leaders to scandalize,
Enemies to neutralize,
No time to apologize,
Fury to tranquilize,
Weapons to synchronize,
Cities to vaporize."

yeah, ~ize~ of the world.

then this gets me confused about about the perspective on life i should have.
a quote i like is 'the meaning of life is to give life meaning.' now that's positive and optimistic.
i just don't know where to start though, being the somewhat socially awkward person i am, with one of the reasons for this being not able to find a genuine personality yet..

a while ago someone told me i had some kind of multi-personality disorder. haha.


then i think, this is all probably pretty much just a phase.. which will pass.

SORRY FOR THE ramble.







on ze other hand...
I AM SO EXCITED ABOUT:

December 8: GREEN DAY!
on December 10... POSSIBLY animal collective.. i love animal collective and my friend wants me to go, but i think i would not really fit in with the crowd.. because yeah.. it is 18+ but they let you in if you have a guardian. meh.
February 20: SOUNDWAVE!!! (mcr, paramore, escape the fate, all time low, afi and so on )
March 17: COBRA STARSHIP!!!!! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU SO MUCH LORENA AND MOLLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*dies*
heck yesssssssssssssss
i am.. yeah i can't think of a reference, but the show will be positively delicious.






oh and stasha's halloween party on, halloween hahaha. yessss, i am quite excited about that too!
i just need a costume, which i don't have yet.
thinking something with lots of blood or something.







ohh, and i think it's pretty ironic how i want to study psychology and help people by being something like a psychologist and i can't even deal with my own feelings. haha.

meh, from the fabulous peter-pan-esque lyrics of headfist for halos, 'think happy thoughts.'
i don't know if they're being satirical (they probably are), but whatever.






TL;DR
i'm contemplating the many confusing aspects of life and can't find a proper perspective/s.
i am very excited about upcoming concerts, such as cobra starship thanks to lorena and molly!
my blood is rich in irony.
that was lame.
heheh.




~~what are your favorite happy songs?~~
my favorite is bowl of oranges by bright eyes, at the moment.

To Whom It May Concern…
July 6th, 2009

Ryan Ross and Jon Walker will be leaving Panic at the Disco to embark on a musical excursion of their own. Though the four of us have made music together in the past, we’ve creatively evolved in different directions which has compromised what each of us want to personally achieve. Over the years, we have remained close and honest with each other, which helped us to realize that our goals were different and that parting ways is truly what is best for each of us. We are all excited for the future, you should be too.

-Ryan & Jon

Stay posted to the Panic site for updates on Ryan and Jon’s new project, as well as a message from Brendon and Spencer who will continue on as Panic At The Disco. All touring and album plans for Panic will continue as previously announced.






wow.




T_______________________________________________________T

bandit lee way, hello. ;D

ZOMGZ GERARD I THOURT U MY LUVER
but i guess not..
I WWANTED DIE
I WANTED DIE!!!
AHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAA

anyway yeah
i haven't been mcr stalking for a while.. but it's cool to hear he had his baby girl. i am so interested to see how she grows up.


um anyway
i just needed to update my journal.

biUHIWUDHWEIUFHWAEFAU SEEING ALL TIME LOW IN 5 DAYS.
SO.
EXCITED.
thanks so much molly for the tickets!! ;D *flails*



OMG IN OTHER NEWS
THE ACADEMY IS... IS COMING BACK TO AUSTRALIA IN AUGUSTTTT!!!!
ZOMGZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
COOL BEANS.

i want to go. they are supporting anberlin... i know right WHY ARE THEY A SUPPORT ACT T___T but it'll still be good to see them!
i have heard much about anberlin, but i haven't listened to them.

BUT YAYYYYYYYY!!!!

and i can't decide whether i want to go to 3oh!3 or not, tickets are $40, but idk who their support acts are. but it would still be superfun!!

ugh i have more i have to say..
so much to say..
such little significance.

bye !

Saw FOB on Friday, THEY WERE AMAZING.
Jfc they are just so insanely incredible.

Molly and I went to the before show Question and Answers thing and waited for them to come out.
First we saw Andy, and then everyone else emerged, and everyone was screaming.
I was am glad I actually stayed relatively contained, a big improvement from last time. (How embarassing, me being my grade 8 year old fangirl self who couldn't see anyone until I lifted up my phone and saw them through that, and proclaimed my excitement, half way through they song)
(See here: [link] )

But ah. I was just kind of admiring them from the barrier, they're so.. real. Haha. Pete's laugh is kind of creepy but I like it, Joe's voice is so freaking cool, Jewish lisp ftw, Andy was awesome, and Patrick was just so adorable and sweet, especially with his beanie (which I don't know why he was wearing, it's summer...)

So they answered some questions.
"Pete, who would you turn gay for?"
"Trick question- I already am"

"Your dream girl?"
*thinks after a few more questions* "Ariel from the Little Mermaid"

"Are you guys going to have like a spin-off from One Tree Hill?"
(Pete) "We already have a spin-off, it's called Panic at the Disco"

"Pete, what's with your obsession with Cobra Starship?"
"What's with YOUR obsession with them?"


Hah, and so on. Then the guys from Hey Monday came out and one of them sat on Pete (See here: [link] )

Then they went off, and security made us sit down, then stand up when other people arrived. Saw Hey Monday, they weren't too bad. Guys were pretty cute, in a Short Stack kinda way hahaha. But yeah they were okay. Best part probably was when Pete came out to sing with Cassadee, hahaha.

Then it was AAR, omfg, I swear Tyson Ritter had had one too many, he was fucking crazy! Still sung greattt. His choice in clothes kinda confused me but still, it was very nice. Pink skinnies on a man, I hadn't seen that before. My fave song they sung was probably Move Along, I Wanna or Gives You Hell.

Off with AAR, then on with FOB chanting. Then they came out, starting with Thnks Fr Th Mmrs, then playing their other songs. Really good too haha. Mosh wasn't as pushy as AAR, though AAR mosh was still really fun, even if it was squishy. But the fact it was FOB was awesomeee.

Pete then talked about Gabe and other delicious things like that, told us to detox just to retox, wore a shirt under a hoodie under a jacket, then took all of it off at some stage. In Saturday, the last song, Pete pulled his shirt over Patrick's face, WTF?! Patrick didn't get to sing a line because he was pulled away from the mic. Awwwwwh.
(Here is you wanna watch it, from 2:20 [link] )

Also in Dance, Dance, Pete did the shakey wiggley thing which scarred me for life and afterlife but was.. interesting and strangely cute, and Pat drew the loveheart ^____^


Overall, one of the best nights ever
One of THOSE Nights.
Lol I had to.

But yeah and Lullabye was adorable.



YAYYAYAYAYAYAAY!
Can't wait for the next show
Or for PATD, MCR, CS, or TAI to tour here again, or to see the Cab or All Time Lowww. I also think seeing 3OH!3 would be really fun.

Ahhhhh I want merchh. Or Clandy stuff.

FOB <333333


ANYWAY.
Mmm so today was meh. Fell out of bed (not really but you know), caught the train, went to school, caught the train home, shared chips with my sister and her friend (there goes my Lent giving-up-ness, but ehh I'll start again), did my maths homework on the trampoline, etc, now I am here. Yayayayay.

Btw this video made me laugh at how stupid people can be, watch it if you're bored:
[link]

~x~
<~~ check them out!

Stealing from Lorena and Molly

If I were a month I would be:
March

If I were a day of the week I would be:
Saturday

If I were a time of day I would be:
4:00pm

If I were a planet I would be:
Mars

If I were a animal I would be:
A rabbit

If I were a direction I would be:
Northern? hahha

If I were a piece of furniture I would be:
A chair

If I were a historical figure I would be:
Audrey Hepburn? is she a historical figure? lol

If I were a liquid I would be:
Chicken and corn soup

If I were a tree I would be:
Cherry blossom? Not really, I just like them lol

If I were a flower/plant I would be:
Marajuana
haha j/k, a rose. Simply because of the rosevest.

If I were a kind of weather I would be:
Rainy

If I were a musical instrument I would be:
Keytarr

If I were an emotion I would be:
Confused

If I were a color I would be:
Blew (lol)

If I were a vegetable I would be:
A potato/mushroom

If I were a sound I would be:
Ryan Ross' monotone <3

If I were an element I would be:
Air

If I were a car I would be:
Cobramobile

If I were a song I would be:
A Little Less Sixteen Candles, a Little More, "Touch Me" - Fall Out Boy

If I were a movie I would be directed by:
Hayao Miyazaki (Howl's Moving Castle)

If I were a book I would be written by:
Chuck Palahniuk

If I were a food I would be:
A dumpling

If I were a place I would be:
The beach

If I were a material I would be:
Ribbon stuff?

If I were a taste I would be:
Asian

If I were a scent I would be:
Strawberry

If I were a word I would be:
Metamorphosis...

If I were an object I would be:
An iPod

If I were a body part I would be:
Hands

If I were a facial expression I would be:
Smiling?

If I were a cartoon character I would be:
Aladdin

If I were a shape I would be a:
A rounded square? haha

If I were a number I would be:
27

If I were a Pokemon I would be:
Vulpix! I love it! [link]

If I were a monster I would be:
Loch Ness! <3